How to OWN THE ROOM from any Stage

June 18th, 2019

It was one of those warm days last week, where we were all saying “Spring! You’re back! Thank you for coming back!” and we went outside and strolled through the yard, and spotted the crocuses, and didn’t even get a chill after being outside for a bunch of hours. 

It was that kind of early spring day. 

I walked outside and saw my new-ish neighbor across the street with his 5 year old son. They out in their yard digging around in the grass. 

Since it was spring, I went over to say hello. We stood in the grass and chatted. Ari, the 5-year-old, told me about the things they were planting in the ground, and the rock party they were having, and how big the rocks are and how heavy they are to move. 

When I walked away, he shouted “BYE!!” 
and did a little leap for joy. 

I suspect he was surprised when I did a little leap for joy in return and said “BYE!” 

Then he leapt again, even bigger, and shouted BYE again, and I leapt again, bigger still, and shouted BYE again. 

As I walked across the street we both did bigger and bigger leaps for joy as we shouted BYE even louder and louder. 

Definitely a sublime moment of joy. 

I’m telling you this because THAT’S HOW CONNECTION WORKS. 

One person has to be willing to take the first leap. 

When one person takes the first leap — in the direction of joy, in the direction of reaching for authentic connection, in the direction of showing a piece of your humanity, in the direction of vulnerability — it’s way easier for someone else to follow suit. 

But something happens to so many of us when we become grown-ups. 

We hold our cards close to our chest. We wait for someone else to make the first move. We play with caution. We hold out till we’re certain that we’re not gonna be hanging out there all by ourselves in the vast and unchartered territory of vulnerability. 

That is, unless we don’t. 

You could be the person who takes the first leap! 

Think about a speaking situation you’ve been in — On stage, or in a meeting, or in a difficult conversation with someone you care about. Or at a party, or a networking event. Or in the grocery story. 

Did you take the first leap of joy? Did you take the risk of showing a little more of yourself as a way of opening the door for your audience (whether 2 or 25 or 500 people) to do the same? 

That’s the speaker who owns the room. 

Owning the room is about so much more than confidence. It’s about showing up and opening your heart and leaping for joy and inviting the audience to leap with you! 

We all want our hearts to be open. 

So the speaker who opens his or her heart first 
gives a tremendous give to the rest of us.