What I learned in jail: 3 powerful steps to SELL anything

August 1st, 2014

No, I’ve never actually been convicted of a crime or done time in jail, but I do work occasionally as an actor with Colorado Police Departments. I work  as a role-player in Crisis Intervention Trainings and help cops learn skills for offering resource to people with mental illness in crisis.

(That’s a picture of me portraying a person with schizophrenia debugging all the electronics in her house.)

I love this work. I love that I get to see into the lives of police officers, see them in a  vulnerable spot of learning, and be of service in a way that is super fun, too.

Last week I learned 3 important steps in making a SALE while I was role-playing a depressed cop.

Since I’ve been building this business as a Public Speaking coach over the last 3 years, I confess that sales has not always been my friend. 

But now, artsy, earthy, go-with-the-flow, don’t-wanna-get-in-anyone’s-face, “nice” Midwestern gal that I am, I have come to realize that if you’re not selling, you pretty much don’t have a business.

When you speak in public, like it or not, you’re selling.

Even if it’s just a new idea you’re selling, you’re asking the audience to trade something in (an old idea) for the thing you’re offering (a new idea). [Read Daniel Pink’s “To Sell is Human” if you have a business and you need help making friends with selling.]

Back to the jail. Here’s the story. 

I was at Adams County jail role-playing a depressed, potentially suicidal detention officer. The cop hadn’t shown up for work in a few days. The student officer was assigned to come to my home to check on me and see what was up.

And then to sell me the idea of getting help.

Some of the cops didn’t do so great,  and I wasn’t buying. I stayed stuck in my hopeless depression.

But the ones who did get me to go with them really nailed it. 

My character was depressed. She hated her job. She was feeling hopelessness in every direction. The student officer that nailed it said “I know exactly how you feel. I sometimes hate my job too. Long hours, depressing surroundings…I get it.” 

Then he proceeded to tell the story of his own challenges with work.  He was vulnerable. He showed me that he was really listening to my concerns and understood them. I trusted him because he showed me his humanness.

Step 1: Connect on an authentic, human level and identify the pain. Be vulnerable. Tell your story.

Next, he told me what he did to get out of his own depression. He shared how it saved his marriage, how he was now a much better parent, and how there really are people out there who care. He got really specific about what my life could look like if I got help. He drew a picture that was not too out-of-reach, but enough to get me to take action, and clearly showed me how my life would change.

Step 2: Paint a super specific picture of what’s possible. Show clearly what’s in it for your audience.

Last, he told me exactly what to do.  He told me exactly how to get from A to B, and how he could help me get there. He didn’t suggest I’d feel better tomorrow, or tell me to look on the bright side, or offer 500 things I could try. He told me one action I could take right now. The very next thing. A baby step. He said “I’ll sit down with you right now and let’s call Nicoletti’s office together.”

Step 3: Be specific about how your audience can take action. Tell them exactly what to do the moment they walk out the door that will CLOSE THE GAP between the old life and the new one. 

That’s the cop that got me to take action. I believed him. He connected with me, identified my pain, shared his own story, showed me what was possible, and showed me how to get there.

Try these three steps next time you’re working on a talk, or sharing a new idea, or convincing someone to get on board with a new venture, and watch your audience say “YES!” to whatever it is you’re selling. You can sell anything. Then come back to the blog and tell us about it in the comments!